I make me suffer - Nobody and/or nothing else!!

by Elna
(Randburg, South Africa)

I MAKE ME SUFFER....nobody and nothing else!!!
I decided that my life was worth more than my rapist taking control over my mind, my memories, my feelings, my emotions and my life!!
I decided that my life was worth much, much more than allowing my bipolar disorder, my depression, my PMS yes it happens to some women, for real :-) or any other health problems or issues get me out of feeling, expressing, experiencing, crying, laughing, doing, understanding, nurcharing and loving!!
TODAY - MY HEART BEATS WARM!!
I SCREAM, THROW TANTRUMS, BURST OUT LAUGHING, BURST INTO TEARS BUT FEEL,UNDERSTAND, KNOW AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY ACTIONS AND NEVER, EVER BLAME MY ILLNESSES FOR MY BEHAVIOR, ACTIONS AND SH*T I MAKE OR HAVOC I CREATE!!
I am the ONLY one who can decide to live!
I am the ONLY one who can decide to feel!
I am the ONLY one who can decide to hope!
I am the ONLY one who can decide to love!