Uncomfortable Experience

Aug 02, 2008

Uncomfortable Experience
by: Sharon Frith

Hi Beverly

I thought I'd respond to your posting in regards to the Session One you had with the lady who you set a money goal with but felt that she was 'all over the show'.

I wanted to comment firstly to reassure you that I think you did the right thing by not taking the coaching any further. It certainly seems that there are deeper issues that need to be worked on before your client can benefit from coaching and I think counselling is something that could help her to come to terms with the more deep rooted issues that are holding her back.

This is a valuable experience for you and it's only by having sessions like this that truly allow ourselves to evaluate ourselves as Coaches.

From what you said in your posting, I feel that you handled this session as well as you could - it certainly is worth now asking yourself what you feel you did well and what you feel you would do differently if you came across a client like this again.

A couple of questions that you could ask which will help you in the future are these:

A) What specifically would you like to gain from this coaching experience?

B) What do you feel is stopping you from getting these benefits? I ask you this because I feel that you are experiencing some internal conflict and I would like to explore that with you. What conflicts do you feel are going on for you right now?

If the client feels that coaching would help her but doesn't really know what she wants, then you can start by exploring her values and her conflicts (session 5) then looking at rules and beliefs BEFORE setting a goal. The sessions 1-13 are a general guide and perfect if someone knows what they want but when someone doesn't know what they want or you feel there are some deeper issues then you can swap the sessions around so that you can find out a little more about what blocks they have before setting a goal.

This is only worthwhile if your client is not depressed, just a little confused and needs some direction. A client, however, who is showing clear signs of depression, should not be coached and should definitely be referred to a counsellor.

Hope this helps Beverly and congratulations on handling a challenging session. Use this experience to grow as a Coach. The biggest challenges are usually the biggest blessings.

Sharon

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Aug 02, 2008
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Submitted by: Sharon Frith

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Hi Beverly I thought I'd respond to your posting in regards to the Session One you had with the lady who you set a money goal with but felt that she was 'all over the show'. I wanted to comment firstly to reassure you that I think you did the right thing by not taking the coaching any further. It certainly seems that there are deeper issues that need to be worked on before your client can benefit from coaching and I think counselling is something that could help her to come to terms with the more deep rooted issues that are holding her back. This is a valuable experience for you and it's only by having sessions like this that truly allow ourselves to evaluate ourselves as Coaches. From what you said in your posting, I feel that you handled this session as well as you could - it certainly is worth now asking yourself what you feel you did well and what you feel you would do differently if you came across a client like this again. A couple of questions that you could ask which will help you in the future are these: A) What specifically would you like to gain from this coaching experience? B) What do you feel is stopping you from getting these benefits? I ask you this because I feel that you are experiencing some internal conflict and I would like to explore that with you. What conflicts do you feel are going on for you right now? If the client feels that coaching would help her but doesn't really know what she wants, then you can start by exploring her values and her conflicts (session 5) then looking at rules and beliefs BEFORE setting a goal. The sessions 1-13 are a general guide and perfect if someone knows what they want but when someone doesn't know what they want or you feel there are some deeper issues then you can swap the sessions around so that you can find out a little more about what blocks they have before setting a goal. This is only worthwhile if your client is not depressed, just a little confused and needs some direction. A client, however, who is showing clear signs of depression, should not be coached and should definitely be referred to a counsellor. Hope this helps Beverly and congratulations on handling a challenging session. Use this experience to grow as a Coach. The biggest challenges are usually the biggest blessings. Sharon

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